Post-election investment advice: Go long on therapy dog (and cat) providers

**Written by Doug Powers

A couple days after the election I speculated that therapy dogs would have to be brought in to console those traumatized by the election. What I didn’t realize is that the real world had already beat me to it. This happened on Capitol Hill after the election:

On a gloomy, rainy morning in D.C. — where President-elect Donald Trump won only 4 percent of the vote the night before — five therapy dogs waited to put a smile on staffers’ faces.

“I feel so much better now,” one intern said, stopping short when she walked into Cannon 121 on Wednesday.

The Human Animal Bond Research Initiative, Pet Partners, the Pet Leadership Council and the Pet Industry Joint Advisory Council teamed up to bring the dogs to help staffers relieve stress, cheer up and find comfort, an idea that came into fruition well before the election results came in.
[…]
Two giant white Samoyed therapy dogs — Zamboni and Spumoni — gave everyone who approached hugs and kisses.

“Out of everything in the country right now, no one needs it more than Capitol Hill,” said Mike Bober, president of the Pet Industry Joint Advisory Council.

Pet these fine looking animals and feel your Electoral College rage melt away, at least until something else horrible happens:

Therapy dogs were also brought in to console those students in NYC’s elite circles whose nannies and/or au pairs aren’t trained in grief counselors:

The Post revealed last week that coddled kids at elite schools were being offered disaster counseling to deal with President-elect Trump and their depressed liberal parents.

Now we’re told that “pettable” pooches were brought to private school Avenues, which said in a letter that its faculty had backed Hillary Clinton, and “our students brought a great deal of emotion, anxiety and strong feelings” after Trump won.

But wait, there’s more:

Dozens of students at Cornell University gathered on a major campus thoroughfare for a “cry-in” to mourn the results of the 2016 presidential election Wednesday, with school staff providing tissues and hot chocolate.

At Tufts University, arts and crafts were on offer. And the University of Kansas reminded students via social media of the therapy dogs available for comfort every other Wednesday.

For delicate snowflakes emotionally damaged by the election but who are also afraid of and/or allergic to dogs, therapy cats were made available at UPenn:

One of the dorms on campus even set up a “breathing space” the night after election day. Cats, a puppy, coloring pages, and snacks were offered to help students “decompress in a low-key and low-stress environment.” The event certainly had a timid and fearful undertone, as students were hesitant to discuss what awaits the United States in January.

Capitol Hill staffers, university and high school students who are triggered by Trump, dogs and cats should lock themselves in empty closets until the “all clear” sounds — but it could be a while.

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe