Al Gore in south Florida to campaign for Hillary, quietly weep in courthouse closet next to dusty box of 16-year-old ballots


**Written by Doug Powers

Southern Florida authorities are bracing for a spike in reports of clown sightings:

Former Vice President Al Gore will hit the campaign trail Tuesday for Hillary Clinton, appearing with the Democratic presidential nominee at an event in Miami focused on combatting climate change, according to a Clinton campaign official.

The aide said Gore and Clinton will “lay out what’s at stake in this election by highlighting the urgent threat of climate change” which the campaign says affects Americans’ health, security and the economy.

At the Florida event, just ahead of the battleground state’s voter registration deadline, Clinton is expected to discuss rising sea levels in Miami as well as the historic drought in the West.

The Clinton campaign has tasked Gore with helping bring millennials on board by scaring the crap out of them about the end of the world due to out-of-control emissions while enticing others to become premium donors by offering tours of his private jet.

Gore’s going to warn people in south Florida that the area could soon be under water:

With Mr. Gore by her side, the campaign said Mrs. Clinton would discuss the effects of climate change, from rising sea levels in Miami to a drought in the West, and pledge to protect the Paris climate agreement that Mr. Trump has disparaged.

That must be why property values in south Florida are plummeting. Oh, wait:

**Written by Doug Powers

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