Newsweek wants you to meet the Pence family — Serial pet killers


**Written by Doug Powers

Pets owned by Mike Pence’s family are not unlike the pets of any of the rest of us: Sadly they grow old and eventually die with no surrounding suspicious circumstances. If you’re the media and looking for an angle, however, you might come up with something like Newsweek tried to dress up as journalism that instead smells more like the inside of a rabbit’s cage that hasn’t been cleaned in a couple of weeks:

Mike Pence’s pets won’t stop dying

— Newsweek (@Newsweek) December 8, 2017

Not unlike Newsweek. And yep, that’s the headline alright:

The first question that popped into my head was “What did those animals have on the Clintons?”

The article lists all the Pences pets that have lost in ways that all pet owners lose pets, and eventually admits that the whole article was barely worthy of bird cage liner:

It is unclear if the stress of Washington life is getting to the Pences’ political animals. The typical lifespan for a cat is between 12 to 15 years, so Pickle and Oreo had full lives. The same can be said for Maverick, as beagles typically live between 12 and 15 years, and he made it to the ripe old age of 13. So perhaps there isn’t any capital intrigue to the issue.

Shorter version of that closing paragraph: “It’s unclear if the stress of political life is getting to the Pence pets. Actually no it isn’t — we’re just total hacks.”

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe